Photo by Mika Baumeister on Unsplash

What’s up with the dating scene?

Andrew Mensah-Twumasi

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Tales of a ride-hailing-app driver:

I picked up 3 women in North London the other week.

It was a short journey. But we found ourselves talking about dating. This subject must of followed on from a question on my cue cards (on my headrest).

“What has made you smile today?”

I didn’t have much to smile about! I’d just had a bang average pizza. But that tone may have segued into Pizza.

They were 33. They said -

“All the guys we date, when things require commitment, they tend to get jittery”

That’s not to say the city boys are up. The conversation centered around not having time for games at our age — on dating apps, and in real life.

I said I planned on surprising someone on the Sunday at the Barbican, after a little tiff. That went well!

But, what is in the water at the moment when I comes to dating?

On the opposite side of spectrum as to conversations, I picked up a gent from nearby Wembley. I was late for the schedule reservation due to the traffic in the area — England were playing Malta.

We soon got into a conversation about how I became a driver, backpacking, and South Africa — I have travelled Central and South America, which he had seen much of, but South Africa because he worked there as part of a placement.

We discussed some of the simple things in life and values, and how they can be misplaced when you’ve lived in a city like London, as opposed to when travelling. We began exchanging stories! He told me about people pretending to be the police and car-jackings, the garden city, safaris, and homestay’s in some of the townships.

Honestly, my eyes filled up when he told me about some of his experiences. He discussed of some of the things he done during his homestay in the townships — teaching English and playing games with the children. They often played cards, and shortly before leaving his stay in the township, one of the children asked him if they could keep them when he left. Back to values and some of the simple things in life — something which had little value to him, meant so much to this child. The emotion in him recalling his experience pulled me in! As he stared at me, I could feel at that precise moment he was there in the township…So was I! I then told him about an experience in Colombia.

I told him I was fortunate to stay with my tutor in Bogota for 7–10 days. In that time, her my mum took me everywhere! At that point, I couldn’t speak Spanish well, so we only communicated through expressions and vibes — food etc. I put on weight in my 7–10 days. Good food!

My tutor, who I would I’d like to call my friend will never know the importance of those 7–10 days I stayed with her. She asked me to visit her school — she taught English.

She asked me often — “Will it be ok?” and “Are you sure you can?”

I found it a little amusing as to why I wouldn’t. But it clearly meant a lot to her that I visited the school and spoke with her students. An experience they may not of had before. I was only there for an hour or so, but I found the whole day so humbling — speaking with the students, learning, and taking a group photo.

I recall them asking me about my travel experiences and Colombia. And in return, I asked if they would visit Europe. I can’t recall their response I think it was a simple no. But in a break in conversation, my tutor informed me that unfortunately some of the students will never experience travelling to Europe. Some of them may not even leave Colombia. I was baffled! Why? … The economics.

I recall my tutor telling me she earned equivalent to £400pm as a teacher. From my knowledge, she was the only one who worked in the household. As we became friends, I also remember her telling me about the financial challenges she had in London. I don’t like assuming, but their challenges were far greater than hers. Those students will be 20+ now. I occasionally think about them and look at the photo. It makes me think about how fortunate I am, but also how lucky I was — to have met them and shared that and those experiences in Colombia/South America.

2023 — searching for the simple things in life, restoring values, and how they have been misplaced.

I’ll be here every week posting and sharing my stores and reflections. But you can find more content — POV in the car, and short form content via my IG/TikTok/YouTube Channel @andrewmensahjr. And before I forget my podcast also, full of short stories — ‘Hi, Andrew?! My Journey’ — available via Apple Podcasts and Spotify, and wherever you get your podcasts.

(Click Me!!) Link for my book ‘Hi, Andrew?! My Journey’

(Click Me!!) Link for my YouTube channel

(Click Me!!) Link for my Podcast

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